This is very personal and I’m going to try to deal with it in a respectful and tasteful way. I guess the best way to do this is start out nice and easy and get more complex as we go. I’m pansexual. This means I love pans, especially cast iron pans. Ok, while that is true, pansexual really means that the gender of the person really doesn’t matter. I find that I am attracted to men, women, people who are neither, and people who are both. Now, you might say this sounds like being bisexual and honestly, I have yet to find a real difference between bisexual and pansexual. I think it has more to do with perception of the words than any actual difference. This is why I usually say I’m bi.
My bisexuality seems to fluctuate. I always find both male and female bodies attractive, but sometimes, I’m thinking about guys almost all the time. Other times, I’m thinking about women. A legitimate question here is, do I find trans men and trans women attractive? I do, there is no question about that. I have seen some very attractive and sexy looking trans men and women. Right now, I’m dating a cis woman, this doesn’t make me any less bi. Why? Because I’m still attracted to both. Also, I’m dating a cis man, but that is not why I’m still bi. Also, I’m in a period where women are on my mind a lot. Still bi, still attracted to men.
To make things more interesting, while I am attracted to physical bodies, I’m sapiosexual. Arrgh, another sexuality! My poor brain can’t take it. Right? This one is pretty easy. It simply means that I’m attracted to intelligence. There is no bigger turn on for me than stimulating conversation. Ok, not quite, the single biggest turn on for me is physical contact, but intelligent conversation is a close second. Also, you’re not likely to get into the position to touch me in a way that will turn me on without having had some good conversation first.
Of course, that’s not all. I’m also a demisexual. I have to form an emotional bond before I’ll let you get close to me. I have had sex without a relationship and it was ok, but not really what I like. Sex with someone I love is so much better than with someone I know little about. When there is that emotional bond, everything is just so much better.
I’m not yet sure if I am polyamorous. That is, do I prefer to be in multiple relationships at the same time. The idea is interesting and, if done right, seems like a way to get all of your needs met. I’m trying it to see if it is something that appeals to me. If it isn’t, then it isn’t. I don’t see where I lost anything.
So, summing up these two posts, I am definitely a transgender woman who is pansexual, both demisexual and sapiosexual, and into kink. All this with a possibility of being polyamorous. Now you have a better understanding of where your humble blogger is coming from when she talks about sex and sexuality and some of the more unusual aspects of both. And, hopefully, opens up others to talk about sex and sexuality.